Self Raised Teens

July 2026

When teenagers and young children grow up with parents that they do not admire or idolise, they tend toward raising themselves. This contributes to a kind of societal chaos: adults who never fully mature, lack purpose, and who often struggle to sustain or form stable families.

The parental foundation is crucial. Children need parents or adults whom they can admire and idolise to an extent, who'll take them under their wing and show them the ropes of life. This is essential when they're small, but it is also crucial during their teenage years.

Children and young people struggle with absence (both emotionally and in presence), hypocrisy, chaos or adults who seem lost and immature.

So, be the kind of adult worth admiring. Show up consistently. Take responsibility. Pursue meaningful work and relationships. Model resilience and self-correction when you fall short. Create an environment where your kids (and the young people around you) can see what mature adulthood actually looks like up close. Be stable and provide stability. Show them how proud of them that you are, and be there for them when they fall short. Attacking somebody when they make a mistake only worsens their ability, and even more so for children and teens.

Now, this doesn't require perfection. Kids are forgiving of imperfect but sincere and growing parents. Not necessarily out of conscious decision, but because they are naturally pre-disposed to this. They can't afford to simply dismiss an adult who is not perfect - and perfect people do not exist anyways. They are forced to live with whatever card was dealt to them, so why not hand them the best card they could get?